Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life. ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities
I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons. ~Johann Schiller
Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. ~Charles Schulz
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