Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons. ~Johann Schiller
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. ~Ogden Nash
It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever. ~Author Unknown
Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown. ~Author Unknown
He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father! ~Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year: The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again. ~Menachem Mendel Schneerson
When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. ~Lucille Ball
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