Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. ~Charles Schulz
Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. ~Don Marquis
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold
Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. ~Tom Wilson
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life. ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. ~Charles Schulz
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